Date:1st August 2014 at 6:03pm
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What thought comes into your head when you hear the word ‘obsession’?

It could be how you feel about chocolate; or that ex-girlfriend who dumped you for a better looking chap.

It could be the fact we all check our smartphones every 26 seconds to see if we have been called, text, Whats’Apped or emailed. Are we that important?

How about OCD? Isn’t that just polishing the same coffee table over and over again? Perhaps it is lining up all of your pencils at work from smallest to largest and screaming at a colleague who moves them?

This summer, it appears a new obsession has gripped Manchester United. It is the worst type of OCD possible.

OCVD: Obsessive Compulsive Vidal Disorder.

Has there been a summer in the history of the club when the complete fanbase have been more head over heels, blind drunk, embarrassingly delusional over a footballer who isn’t even that good?

(Wesley Sneijder two years ago? That was more the media trying to create a story that wasn’t there, but point taken).

The dream team pairing of Arturo Vidal and Paul Pogba, who are apparently worth a combined total of £120m done alright in last year’s Champions League didn’t they?

Group stage exit at the hands of Galatasaray.

OK, Juventus ran riot domestically – but Serie A is not in a peak era – as proved by European performances from their sides.

For a #TopRed, each day involves hanging off of every word an ‘in the know’ Twitter account puts out there; or listening to cringe-worthy British journalists pretend they’ve got a scoop, when in fact they source their stories from foreign press, who source their stories from, you guessed it, an ‘in the know’ Twitter account.

How often does a person refresh Twitter to see if the agent of Vidal has made another pointless comment?

Is he back from his holiday? What were those comments his neighbours made? Has he had a meeting with Allegri? What was his body language like?

Arturo Vidal is a good footballer. He is a tenacious, balling winning midfielder who can also create chances. He can dominate a football match in a similar vein to Roy Keane.

…..Is he worth €60m? …..Is he worth €200k per week? Only God knows. (Yep, I went there).

When it is announced that the man who is obviously bigger than Jesus Christ will not be arriving at Old Trafford – perhaps we could take a look at a couple of alternatives.

DO NOT PANIC: The deal for Vidal has not been called off. I know nothing. I am merely suggesting, what if.

Kevin Strootman

Potential cost: £30m

Van Gaal absolutely adores Strootman. An ever present for him at international level; the boss would probably prefer him over Vidal. Maybe it is worth waiting until December and making a bid for Strootman once fully recovered from a long term injury?

Nigel De Jong

Potential cost: £10m

Another Dutchman. Being a former City player may be a problem but once De Jong kung-fu kicks Gerrard in the ribs, all will be forgiven. Available for a modest price and would offer fantastic protection for the flair players. Does not get enough credit for his footballing ability. Would you fight De Jong? I wouldn’t.


Potential cost: £20m

Every bit a dominant Premier League midfielder. Would add a certain thrust to a stale United midfielder. Athletic and strong. Would walk into the side without breaking a sweat. Keep him fit and you have a world class player on your hands.

Lars Bender

Potential cost: £22m

A multi-talented midfielder who will eventually move to a big European side. Capped numerous times by World Cup winners Germany. What is not to like about Lars? Equipped in every capacity to run rings around the majority of Premier League opposition.

I believe that most, if not all United fans need to get a grip. Vidal is a good player and would certainly improve the team – but let’s be honest, most players would improve that central midfielder area at Old Trafford.

It is now in the hands of God.

To heavily criticise this article I am on Twitter. Direct your abuse to: @NathonW